B is for...

 B is for Bazball.

Brendan McCullum is being touted the saviour of English Cricket. While Baz has definitely made English Cricket more interesting to watch, I would prefer to remember him as a puppet within the show we got to witness of the King's life. Please click and enjoy.

I've never heard a series hyped so much for a style of play. Usually the mind games began with McGrath pointing out how he was going to own Strauss (the sensible South African import) before the 2005 Ashes series, or Warne targeting Cullinan, even when he wasn't playing South Africa - working in a school, I'm led to believe that you can't do that anymore... 

Stuart Broad (the last time he will be referred to by name - he is now Draco Malfoy) even came out and said he'd been working on a out swinger, just for the Aussie right handers like The Guitarist and The Conductor - he doesn't need any magic tricks for the left handers, or at least one in particular - he owns Warner, The Pool Cleaner. This time it's "Bazball", and it's hard to disagree with the results - I'll bring forward England's impressive start to the first Test after I wax lyrical. But let's put a few things in context, as 87% of all statistics are lies.

* England won 1 test from 17 prior to Coach Baz's appointment, which coincided with Bent Spoke's nod as Captain (Ben Stokes). So any result from that point is going to look positively marvellous - just like Australia achieving 10% economic growth directly after lock downs were lifted. Just on that, Dud (Joe Root) abdicated - which I didn't believe any true Brit would do - blaming Covid restrictions and travel. Didn't seem to be an issue at the beginning of their winning run.

* Let's look at the results: The Poms beat New Zealand 3 out of 3 in the UK, South Africa 2 out of 3 (beaten by an innings in the 1st test) in the UK, Pakistan 3 from 3 in Pakistan (credit there), 1-1 in New Zealand, and then the golfing tour where they stopped at Lord's to dismantle the U/21's Irish side. I would like to see victories in conditions abroad (I mean a-Draco) before I jump onboard (I mean on-Malfoy) and say Bazball has revolutionised the game.

* While I do like to be entertained, I don't want the erosion of grit that can be just as entertaining when a side is on top and it takes sheer mental toughness to get through the hardship. Perseverance is the key to test cricket and I guess I'm against someone throwing their wicket away for a philosophy of "no draws" or "we're entertainers".

In pulling Bazball apart it would seem I'm not a fan. This could not be further from the truth. However, there's a time and place. Cricket writer, Chris Stocks identified seven principles of Bazball that could be promoted by a cricket coach in a team environment at the highest level of the game. They are:

1. A less reflective environment
2. No negative chat
3. A win-at-all-costs mentality
4. No fear of failure
5. Praise – even for the little things
6. Simplicity of message
7. Embracing mental freedom and fun

What's not to love about those principles. Even though I would adjust, number 3 - I believe that got the Aussies into trouble a few years back, and number 5 to "Treat 'em mean, keep 'em keen". I picked that one up at a JL training camp when I was younger. Stocks quoted veteran pace bowler, Malfoy, discussing the mental side of McCullum's approach when he said: "There's no doubt Baz has had an impact already. It's a very positive language in the changing room. It's very forward thinking. All about how to move this game forward". I'm sure he must have been misquoted because he didn't mention himself in the passage.

Anyhow, let's go to Day Two.

B is for ..... I can't believe I've snookered myself so early. B is for Blonde, Brilliant, yet Boorish. 2 wickets in 2 balls to give Australia nightmares - just like when I attended my first ever Boxing Day Test when the Green Caps were rolled for 98 and J. Trott decided to almost double their score by himself. Warner might have to start batting in the middle order because he is owned. I hope he proves me wrong but I'm picking his average won't crack 30 for the series. But, you have to love cricket and the so-called deities that reside over it. On 110, The Pro (Usman K) gets bowled by the blonde bombshell, only to be called back by Umpire George the Animal Steel (from now to be referred to as Umpire GAS) for a font foot infringement.

B is also for Bairstow or Bear bundle. And Jonny seems to have been putting on some Beef too. I know he broke his leg, but that was 6 months ago. I must take my hat off to him though. He batted like he was asked, at a run a ball. His catch to dismiss The Conductor (Marnus Labuschagne) was brilliant - but a shot The Conductor did not need to play - more mind games. But Bear bundle could have really had the Aussies on the ropes if he took a reasonable stumping chance to dismiss Cam Green for a globe.

B could also be for Benjamin Button (James Anderson) who hasn't been a factor yet. Don't write him off. Even though he's 40, he still has one of the sweetest bowling actions on the planet and he may work wonders with the Duke between overs 30 and 60.

But the highlight of the day was definitely The Pro's century celebrations. elated with his first UK Ashes ton, he threw his bat into the air, but then Umpire GAS reminded him he may need it if he wanted to bat on. With the Aussies 80 odd runs behind and 5 wickets in hand, it is set for a glorious Day 3 in which the team who wins 2 of the 3 sessions is likely to be in command for Edgbaston bragging rights. 

Onto Day 3.

JT